Titus 2: 3-5 gives a list of character traits that older women are to teach younger women. The list includes things like how to love their husbands and children, be pure, become homemakers that they might be a good testimony for the Lord. In my life there were 3 women who were my mentors to teach me these things.
It has finally happened. They are all gone on before me. What am I talking about? As a young wife with a husband training to become a pastor there were 3 women that I admired and hoped that, in some small way, I could follow their example of Godliness in the home and in their ministry. These women were Margaret Tice, Bobbie Yearick & Beneth Jones. Each of these women influenced me in some way. The first two I had the privilege of staying in their homes, visiting with them over a meal or cup of tea or coffee. I saw them in their robes, without makeup, first thing in the morning. I watched them as they led other women in the church and listened to them share the lessons that God had taught them. Beneth was more of an acquaintance then a friend. I read all of her books and took every opportunity to hear her speak at retreats and conferences. Although each of these women were different and God gave them vastly different talents and ministries, they each walked the path before me giving me footsteps to follow. Let me share with you the lessons that they taught me.
Since Beneth Peters Jones was the last to enter Heaven, I will start with her. The first time I saw her was on the campus of Bob Jones University. She was beautiful and elegant! Tall, slim, every hair in place, perfectly dressed–everything I dreamed of becoming. There was only 1 small problem with my dreams, I was never going to be as tall and slim as her nor was there any hope of blond hair in my future (unless it was a wig)! For years I admired her from afar and thought she had the perfect life; therefore, I could never hope to be like her. As I grew older and got to know her heart through her talks at conferences I realized that she had many struggles and insecurities which she overcame with God’s grace. One of the things I loved about her was her ability to be honest and transparent. Often when I heard her speak she would share some struggle that she had with submission to her husband or child rearing and I would identify completely. I learned from her life that none of us are perfect though outsiders may see us that way. There is no family that is perfect. But, we serve a perfect, all powerful, loving God who can help us overcome and grow to be the Godly woman that He created us to be.
Bobbie Yearick was my Pastor’s wife when we were members of Hampton Park Baptist Church in Greenville, SC. At this time in my life I was married and my husband was training for the ministry. She was a glowing example of a southern lady. Her energy and compassion for others was impressive to watch. She never considered herself to be above others even though she and her husband were the leaders of a growing, vital church and Christian School. I loved to watch how she greeted people at the door of the church like they were her best friend. In later years I realized that there was no way that she could possibly have known everyone and their struggles in a church of 1500. Yet, she made each person that spoke to her feel like they were the most important person there. She was faithful to her teaching duties and church no matter how she felt. I loved her answer when asked how she was feeling, ” Honey, I feel awful, thanks for asking” she would say with a smile. She told you the truth without depressing you! Mrs. Yearick exemplified southern hospitality. Any time we came by to see her and Pastor Yearick she always wanted to feed you or offer you a drink. It didn’t matter that you had just dropped by. Several times we stayed in her home and I loved having the opportunity to get to know her and her husband in a relaxed atmosphere. She truly loved the Lord and her life and actions proved that.
Margaret Tice was an amazing and versatile woman. She was married to Don Tice who was an energetic, funny, spirit filled preacher. He had many different jobs: business manager, pastor, evangelist. She told me once that they realized early in their marraige that God was going to use them to help ministries that were in financial trouble. Therefore, they moved often taking over distressed ministries and helping them with whatever the problem was at the time. She managed to create beautiful homes and do it with joy no matter where they lived. We stayed in their home a couple of times and it was always a time of encouragement and laughter. They also stayed with us when they came to speak at our camp or church. We could be at our lowest emotionally and they would walk in and immediately start pointing out all we had done and how great our ministry was. One minute you were so depressed and the next the Tices had you laughing and praising the Lord! As I got to know Mrs. Tice, I found out that she was a very strong willed red head who had allowed God to work in her life so that she could glorify him. She told me a story about when they were first married. They were in the kitchen, her husband was sitting at the table and Don made her so mad that she turned around and poured a glass of ice water over his head! I could not imagine this scene knowing how strong and dynamic her husband was and how sweet she seemed. 🙂 Yet, she told me this to illustrate how much God had worked in her life to mold her into a woman of God that knew how to control her emotions and reactions. Margaret was a woman who radiated God’s love and drew others to Him in a variety of ways. She was always trying to improve herself physically, emotionally and spiritually.
All of these women were multi talented. They were educated, writers, speakers, teachers. They could have easily supported themselves and become well know in their own right. But, they chose to help their husbands in their ministries and used their talents to enhance what their husband was called to do. Each of them were also mothers and grandmothers with the usual struggles that we have rearing and helping children with differing personalities. They truly were Proverbs 31 women. Their lives challenged me to use the gifts that God gave me to serve Him while enhancing my husband’s ministry.
Let me challenge you. Even if you husband is not in full time ministry, what are you doing to grow and become a greater help to your husband that he can be used in whatever capacity God has called him? If you are single, what are you doing to grow and improve so that God can use you to serve Him better? No matter what your stage in life your goal should be to bring joy to others and draw them to your Savior, Jesus Christ. Will those following your steps be challenged in their walk with the Lord?